Thanks, Sergey. Good tip!
Hadn't gone deep enough.
FYI: "cannot open connection" > "Could not create connection from Driver" > #42000Unknown character set: 'Win1250'
MySQL doesn't support this character set. Nor does id support Win1252 or iso-8859-1. There is an impressive amount of NHibernate / MySQL examples around that can't work.
Solution: do not specify a CharSet (which is using the default) or specify 'latin1' if you want to use codepage 1252 like I do.
Find character sets supported by MySQL here:
http://dev.mysql.com/doc/refman/5.1/en/charset-charsets.html